Interesting insights into UAE's culture - Invitation to a meal

While searching the net today I found a very interesting article that starts with "Having a meal with an Emirati is an experience everyone must try in the UAE.". I have to admit that I had two chances already to live this experience but in both cases I could not make it - once because of transport and the second time because I did not know that I was invited. :o(

After finishing the article I was taking back a little especially about the fact that "an invitation to a meal must be accepted. Unless it involves life and death, no excuse can cover up for the disappointment an Emirati will feel if you refuse an invitation.".

My dear friends I am very sorry for not demonstrating respect for you and your culture. Ignorance is no excuse! I am very glad to learn my lesson and strive to increase my knowledge and understanding about your unique culture.

And so that you can increase your knowledge as well here the whole article…

An Emirati meal denotes respect

Having a meal with an Emirati is an experience everyone must try in the UAE. Yet, for a foreigner, the experience may differ in the sense that non-Arab guests may not comprehend the hidden meanings in certain actions before, during or after a meal.
As most know, indirect communication plays an essential role in the UAE. We are naturally perceptive to every word or movement of people around us. Do not be fooled, although we may seem unaware, we are like hawks and we see and hear everything around us. Even if you restrain yourself from speaking throughout the meal, you will still manage to tell us stories about your personality, family and intelligence through your manners.

JUST DO IT Although this may seem difficult for some who are not familiar with the tradition, an invitation to a meal must be accepted. Unless it involves life and death, no excuse can cover up for the disappointment an Emirati will feel if you refuse an invitation.

HOT AND FAST When you arrive, any respectable Emirati house will offer you coffee. The cups are small but don’t sip it like you do tea. Shoot it down in two to three sips. Arabic coffee is hot and very concentrated, so the taste may seem bitter to newcomers but do not reveal that to your host. No signs of weakness, remember you are sitting with people of honour.

SILENCE As we say in the Arab world, an intelligent deaf-mute is better than an ignorant person who can speak. You may feel the need to fill up the “uncomfortable silence” with conversation but, for us, silence is a sign of wisdom. Respecting silence will tell your host that your upbringing was of value.

SECONDS, THIRDS, FOURTHS You may be eating on the floor or on a table. Whatever the case, your host or guests around you will continuously fill your plate. Resist as you may, people will still create a mountain of food on your plate, whether you know them or not. Do not be insulted or feel your personal space has been abused. This is a sign of the Arab hospitality and there will never be a need to ask for seconds. Thirds and fourths will follow. You must do your best to eat as much as you can to show your appreciation.

KEEP IT ON THE LOW Growing up as children, we would keep our eyes on the food. If you happened to stare at someone eating, a clip around the head would follow. The reason is this – a person must be able to enjoy their meal as much as humanly possible, while knowing that no one is rudely watching them.

DON’T STOP NOW After the meal, dessert and tea will follow. If you think you couldn’t possibly eat anymore, tough luck. In our tradition, the phrase “no thanks” does not exist. You do, however, have a say in the size of dessert. So don’t give up.

BETWEEN THE LINES Once everyone is sitting comfortably, the conversation will begin. Important topics will be discussed but the role of silence is still valid. People will search for hidden meanings in your words, which takes years of training to understand. So be direct. Even in humour, people send a message across. There is a saying in French that also applies to this situation – when we joke with one another, the truth within me will be revealed.

I’M OUT When it is late, wait for the ending of an important conversation that is followed by a long silence. The key to exiting is this, do it fast. Stand up and move towards the door while simultaneously thanking your host deeply. Everyone will stand but no one will expect a handshake, just a general “salaam” to all. Now go home and recover over the next few days.”

Taryam Al Subaihi, Emirates Today